The Idea of You.

I’ve always considered temp agencies to be the last refuge of a desperate person. The degree to which I need a job is quite staggering, so it should come as no surprise to those who know me that I am, indeed, a desperate person.

Today, I went to my second such agency. As with the first, I was completely honest. No, I don’t want to do anything in sales. Yes, I can type fast. Yes, I have girth where it counts. But after I saw my scores for the personality and skills-related tests I sat through, I realized that successful people just answer to the test. In other words, why be truthful when you can be right?

If a question smells like it’s designed to gauge your responsibility, then you are the biggest overachiever this side of Lisa Simpson. When I was little, I’d give answers I figured authority and parents would want to hear. I am only now beginning to understand that very little has changed now that I am an adult. So, the question becomes, are people successful because they’re good or because they do what other people want?

And during the three and a half hours I was at the temp agency, I thought about how I don’t want to be the guy who just gives the correct answer and gets the extra points. I want to be the other guy – the one who makes up the test. Then I considered that the test maker was The Man, and I decided against wanting to be the testmaker because I don’t want to be The Man. These thoughts are pointless, though. I’m jobless. This is why people stay jobless for most of their lives: they can’t even follow the simplest of rules or jump through even the tiniest of hoops.

Considering that I’ve always felt the world was designed for and around me, today was a great reminder that it is, surprisingly, not. I’ve got to work with it, not against it. So, from now on, I will be a master of the Microsoft Office Suite, I will not think outside the box, I will be a master at data entry and I will always seek out the bottom line. For my company. The bottom line for the company that signs my check. Because we’re only supposed to work for a paycheck.

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In ex-girlfriend news: Rasika Mathur begins her second season on Nick Cannon Presents Wild N’Out tonight (Thursday) at 10PM on MTV. Her guest stint on the forthcoming FOX sitcom Free Ride will be the third week of March, so check your local listings for that.

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Knight Rider: The Movie is officially in turnaround. I am saddened by this news, but bolstered by Tuesday’s release of Knight Rider: Season 3 on DVD. So, so awesome. K.I.T.T. is destroyed in the season premiere, and watching it the other day caused in me the exact same reaction that I had when I watched it for the very first time 17 years ago. Geez… 17 years… When the day comes that I am well-represented and I have some credits to my name, I would love nothing more than to write the Knight Rider movie. To swoop in and save the project… every fanboy’s dream come true.